Workers what?

I know you have all heard me rant, rave, and generally complain about insurance companies before, but it still just blows my mind that almost a full year after my ankle injury I am still having to deal with the insurance companies. One would think that after countless calls, explanations, and even a few times with me being a raging ball of anger towards the poor unsuspecting customer service rep, we would have come to a conclusion and resolved this whole matter and been able to put it behind us. No this is NOT the case. There is still the matter of one bill being labeled as a workers comp. How or why it was ever labeled as such is beyond me. I guess what I find to be the most frustrating is that I keep getting bills, that are becoming increasingly more agitated. I have a vision of a Howler from Harry Potter, you know when Ron and Harry drive the car to school and end up Whomping Willow fertilizer..... That is how I feel when I see yet another notice of a past due payment. I thought, or so said the gentleman from UHC, I wouldn't have to deal with them again because they were going to straighten it out. The poor fellow was the recipient of a good tongue lashing with a very frustrated and overwhelmed me on the other end. I guess the old saying still holds true.."If you want something done right, you have to do it yourself". This is what I am doing, I loath it, and I want it done and over with.

Please for the sake of your own sanity don't get hurt while walking across a seemingly innocent piece of grass, the pain will only linger.

Laugh Attacks

Laugh attacks are when you spontaneously laugh at something that may or may not be funny and can't seem to get yourself under which only further fuels the laughter fire. It is extermely contagious and infects all those around you. There is no exscaping it.



I have had this happen to me on a number of occasions. What causes it or why it happens at all is a mystery. I have a theory that says that we bottle up laughter, much like how people bottle up frustration and anger that eventually explodes in one large outbursts. While the anger and frustration tend to have negative consequences, laughter only has positive. I had one such attack right before bed. Jake and I were just laying there having our nightly conversation, which is usually about nothing in particular and he said something and I made a funny remark that just set me off, which consequently set him off. Soon we were just a giggling, snorting, crying mass of happy. After about 10 to 15 minutes of this insane overpowering of giggles and a few tissues later, I was so relaxed that it was easy to go to drift off to sleep. They make me smile and want to have them more often. You never know when, where, or why an attack will happen. One must be prepared with tissues and something to hold on to when they do decide to descend on an unsuspecting victim.

Family pictures

I love this picture of my whole family being...well..my family. Boy I love these people =D

These are a few of the wonderful pictures we had taken at the beginning of the month. Don't we all look happy? I think so.

TGFB- Thank Goodness For Breaks

If I can think of one thing that I am grateful for at this exact moment is that the break is starting tomorrow. My place of work is one of the most frustrating places one could possibly work, at least for an organizer, planner, and schedule driven person like myself. I understand that there are differences of opinion, perspective, and personality when working in any kind of work place, especially a school. The issue is that when the head teacher of a classroom doesn't think (or plan) ahead, you are only welcoming discord, confusion, frustration, anger, and general chaos! What is most disconcerting is that this is not only on the part of the adults and teachers in a room, but also the children. If the adults don't know what is going on then how are the kids supposed to be able to follow the rules when they haven't a clue on what they could be.

What is most frustrating and almost infuriating is that I feel as though my actions, comments, and general presence is being ignored. Yes, I understand that I am not in an official role as "teacher", so says my title and job description, but I often find myself in that role whether I have sought it out or not. What is also interesting to note is that whether I am an official "teacher" or not the kids come to me first, more often than not, to ask for help of any kind. I love these kids and I only want the best for them, but how can I do that when me myself feel powerless, much like them at times. I look at the other classes and teachers around me and I see that what I am trying to do works! I know it does, common sense says it works, all of my training and books I've read say that what I want to happen works. Yes it will take time and it will be hard, but it needs to be done. Who is being hurt by this, certainly not the adults we already (or should) know. It is the kids that are being hurt by this.

What I also find frustrating is that I am not being paid for the work that I am doing with these kids. Instead of dealing with just one student, I have to deal with 20 of them. At least my student is becoming more independent and self-aware so that I don't have to deal with him as much. What a wonderful thing it is to know that at least one student is developing healthy social and academic skills under my direction.

I guess I just need to have my Christmas break where I am not around these people and have time to cool down and maybe think of another plan of action. That is always the hardest thing carrying out the plan and not being cowed by the others. Grow a backbone, that is my Christmas wish.

Doppelgangers

It is often said that there is another person that looks just like you somewhere in the world. Normally I would think much of it. However, for the last while I have been having continued episodes of seeing doppelgangers of certain individuals of my family. It is always the same people. There is a constant need for me to stop and take a double-take just to make sure that it is not who I it is. There have been times when the feelings of joy and confusion flares when my mind registers for that slight moment that it might be that particular person. Only to be disappointed when it connects that it is not who I thought it was only a very good look alike.
After such incidents I have to think why do I keep seeing my family members when I perfectly well that they do not live in the Provo area and that they wouldn't just randomly show up on the street or gym. It seems as though there might be a deeper psychological issue going on. Maybe I am thinking about them in my subconscious and have a need to see them or resolve a conflict regarding them that has been flowing underneath in my subconscious.
Whatever the reason for this doppelganger occurrence once it is resolved I'll be able to go about my life without having to repress the urge to run up and hug a complete stranger or call out a family members name.