In Need of a Scratchin'

So lately I have been getting an itch that I just can't seem to scratch. This is an itch that every women gets from time to time and I guess it is just time for it to come back. It is the Baby Itch. It seems as though ever since Jake and I celebrated our anniversary over the weekend it has returned with a vengeance. I have dealt with it before and usually I get my baby fix by going to one of my siblings homes or go to work (wonderful birth control sometimes) and get my dose and am good for a several months before it comes back. But this time it just does not seem to want to abate. I think one way it could be connected is the baby blankets that I have been in the process of making. They are so cute and completely different from anything that I have ever done before, and I just want to have my own little one to wrap up in. I am hoping now that my hormones are getting back into balance this itch with subside and I can get focused on life and not the "wants". I know I am not alone in this, this was revealed in a VT visit a while back. However, it still makes me feel like there is a giant blinking neon sign above my head telling everyone that can read what I am thinking and wanting.

Yet, what I find most interesting is that this feeling has only gotten stronger since I have been married. When I was single it was more of a fleeting thought and less of an intense desire and need. I think it has to be associated with the fact that I know have that power with in my grasp and I can have it whenever I desire. Yet, I know that it takes two to tango and to be realistic Jake and I are just not ready to take that step yet. Even though I see the desire in his eyes from time to time, especially when he is paying with a baby in church (he is so adorable! He will make a fantastic dad someday) we both know it just isn't the right thing to do.

I guess this will mean I just have to ignore my itch and find other ways to distract my wants for a couple more years until things are more stable for us and we are truly ready. Sorry my wonderful sisters that mean I will come bug your kids ever once in a while when then itch needs a scratchin'.

Happy First Anniversary

Once upon a time, one year ago to be exact, a beautiful young maiden and a handsome young gentleman were wed in the Salt Lake Temple.....

Today is our first year anniversary! Holy Cow I can't believe that it has already been a year. Granted the calender and my wedding certificate both verify such a thing, it is still a little mind altering that we have been married for a year already. It has been a wonderful first year. Many people say that the first year is often the hardest. I respectfully disagree. Jake and I have had a great time. Very rarely do we ever bicker or fight, what is the point especially since we both like to avoid confrontation as much as possible. True, we have had some ups and downs, but nothing monumentally devastating or scarring. It has been wonderful.

Looking back at reviewing the last 12 months has made me confident that I love Jake more now then I did back then. This is not to mean I didn't love him, it is just that the love and admiration that I had has now blossomed into something far deeper and more meaningful. If this is the trend think of what it will turn into as we live, learn, and grow in the future. The possibilities are endless.

I have been thinking about some of our favorite memories and/or things that Jake and I love.

1. Having my best friend beside me every night
2. Watching the other strive to be the best they can be
3. Having Jake hold my hand and tell me is will be alright when I got hurt
4. Being a shoulder to cry on or just rest a weary head on
   
5. How excited Jake gets when he sees something he loves (like rainbows, snow or rain falling)
6. Tickle fights
7. The way both our eyes crinkle and twinkle when we smile
8. I love Jake's enormous smile and how it takes up his entire face
9. Holding hands, even if we are just sitting at the table or doing nothing
10. Hanging on his arm while we take walks
11. Dancing in the kitchen
12. Just being his wife
13. Going to the temple together
14. Jumping into his arms when he gets home from work/school
15. Sharing sweet pillow talk
16. Cuddling on the couch
17. Notes left
    

The list could go on. It is often the small things that makes life wonderful and I am grateful that I have so many small, and big, things that have helped to strengthen and deepen our love for each other and look forward to allowing it to continue in that manner.

And they continue to live happily ever after.